Trusting a stranger before trusting a king.

So one of the visions I was talking about, I decided to write down, and I talked with Ashley Mayer about it, well I talked to her about alot of things, but anyway,

So I was still frustrated with God, and how I feel he has just up and abandoned me, (right at this moment, I don't know what to think) and I got this vision that didn't make alot of sense, and if I can remember what all of it meant, I'll talk about it.

So here we go,,

I was walking either to or from the skytrain station at Braid, and I saw a man who was sitting alone on the bench near the bus depot, who you could tell was upset.

I decided to go over and talk with him, find out what was wrong really. I asked if anything was wrong, he just remained silent and didn't speak, looked very gloomy and upset ( the posture of the guy is what gave it away). I asked if I could help him out. He replied "Help, why would I need it?". I started to discuss about how if he opened up and told me what was going on that I could help. "I can deal with this myself" he said. "You've tried walking that path for far too long, and look where it has got you, at a dead end." I replied. He asked why he should trust me. I replied you have to trust a stranger before you can trust a king.

The vision ended there, and I realized that I was really the person sitting on the bench, and the man who walked over to help was Jesus. You see, I have been caught up with my defeat that I just wanted to take the easy route and mope on a bench like the man in this story. It was only before I actually discussed my problems with Ashley Mayer today that I finally could understand this. I tried, fell off the horse, and went back into a routine of doing something easy, like playing Maple Story 6 days straight. But you see, I don't see things from God's perspective, I don't see God face to face, right now, as the king upon the throne, I see him as the stranger who is trying to help me get back on the horse, I tried to shoo him away, but persistance and love eventually got me to begin to open up. We have to trust Jesus as a stranger before we can trust him as a King right? He is the good samartian in this story who gains are trust through love, and as we realize who he truely is, we come to respect him as a King.

Hopefully that makes sense. I think Ashley remembers some of the insights I said when I discussed it with her, b/c I don't remember them all. I might have missed some, oh well.

-Brent